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She went out on her fake BSA and was never seen or heard of again! A lesson here for all of us I'd say! What I don't get is why anybody would build a bike to invoke memories and relive the "thrill" of a 1960's Beeza.......cos they were fucking shit! All I ever did was push both of mine around Swansea! I sure as hell don't want to relive that!

Had a leaky fork at work yesterday so I tried making one of those seal cleaners out of an old milk bottle and had a bit of a scrape last night. It seemed to stop the leak, but the ride to work tomorrow will let me know for sure. Gave the Kriega fork cover things a clean up and refitted them, quite a bit of grit loose inside the one on the leaky fork, but clean as a whistle on the fork that is behaving, so I'm hoping that was all it was.

It was decided after a phone call that we would make it to Marbella in a day. It would be across country as well without as many motorways, a plus. The negative was that it was getting hotter! We went to Italia just north of Seville to look at some stuck together stones. I would normally have enjoyed exploring the remains of one of the Romans' largest amphitheatres, but by the time we got there I was running hot, and thought that sheltering under the trees by the entrance was more attractive. Anyway we didn't have a lot of time so Omar and I went for a wander while Titus kept an eye on the bikes. Italica Amphitheatre Then we joined the gridlock that was Seville. I was fuming at this point as my GPS was offering a route avoiding the city. It was generally all that I dislike about cities, heat and traffic, all to save 20 miles. We followed some pleasant enough roads towards Ronda and I was looking forward to a coffee or beer in the shade somewhere when I realised that we were heading towards the town centre. Great I thought - beer. Anyway I was wrong. We went down some cobbled goat path that led to a viewpoint of the bridge above the gorge where apparently people were thrown out of the door to their deaths. It was all that I could do to grab my hat and water and then shelter under a bush until it was time to move! Had it been cooler I'm sure that it would have been a wonderful place to visit. Ronda. The track that we came down was to the right out of shot. I enjoyed the ride down from Ronda to the coast, a tarmac ribbon of bends, bends and more bends. It would have been more fun with less traffic in cooler weather but I still enjoyed it really. It was beer on arrival and more tapas. It was very good of Carmel to put us up for three nights. Lots of beer consumed! Local poster that caught my eye.

I was 17......I didn't need to keep fit! What I needed was to plonk a few birds but the BSA's put the fucking kybosh on that! No joke pushing a Brit POS round Swansea with a fucking hard on!

That boats sailed … you won’t be getting a report … fuck me it was going to be epic , had loads planned

It kept you fit though.

I think I posted on the 'other' forum yesterday , apparently my post has to be verified or something first ............. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Is that your department @Six30 ?

you moved my ride reoprt !! keep moving things.. mods adding to posts , place is a joke , i shant be doing a ride report or taking any photos , not for you twats any way

Just had a FaceButt memory from 2014 turn up.........

The bike had an oil and filter change yesterday, so today it got fuelled to the brim and then went through the Jet Wash! Next stage is a good polish and then clean and lube the chain. Plenty of time to do that though.....cos it's not going anywhere soon!

So it's double gay then

There are bigger.

That’ll do nicely but things are a bit tight money-wise at the moment so I may just have to sit tight……….I could always sell my body to get the extra cash, that way I could probably afford the mirrors after a couple of months.

so whats their term ? we need another vote on new mods .... lets face facts here.... @boboneleg does absolutely fuck all @Buckster well ... he's not mod material , we can all see this now, he gave it a go , bless him , lets thank him for his service and get some new mods in ... lets make his place great again !

Went up to Bude bike night with my mate who doesn’t ride tonight. Probably about 100 bikes there but only took photos of what caught my eye.

What a beautiful uncluttered engine on that MV, loving the hand pump as well

I was quite looking forward to it, the proper English ride report...

Like the Devon one where it never came out of the van? I heard Ewan and Charley wanted to drive their vans round with you after that epic adventure!

They've put you in the sin bin solely because you're a member here?

Great choice of tyre! Bob will say it's gay though!

I had one of those on the front of my Himalayan and it worked just fine.

That looks like our weather forecast, I hope ours is better for Saturday or iam staying at home too.

Maybe you can only use chinese oil on it?

How can that be nice , look at the monstrosity on the back of it ..............

Have you considered removing your string vest?

I thought the same thing after looking at what I wrote, but decided to not delete all that work

New tyre for the rear of the XR arrived today, Only trouble is i think i need a new wheel to put it on, there's a broken spoke a bent one and a few loose ones on the wheel to replace which i have but the rim is in poor condition inside so may go for a rebuild

My mate Titus and I had decided that as we weren't able to do a circumnavigation due to the odd conflict here and there that a trip to Dakar would have to do as a poor substitute. Beer was involved in arriving at this decision. On the morning of 16th March, in drizzle and 11degC, I set off for Plymouth where I was to meet Titus and his son Omar, who'd decided to come along for some father son bonding, and sharing his father's love of travel. Loaded up ready to leave. Sainsbury's Plymouth for breakfast, meet-up and fuel. Then on to Millbay for the ferry. It took an eternity to get through checkin as Omar, late to the party, had booked as a foot passenger, whilst Titus and I plus bikes were on another booking. Computer couldn't cope and there must have been about fifty people involved in sorting it out. Then it was the same again at the customs check. Nightmare. Then I got mugged in the bar. Just leaving Millbay.The bogs where I used to sleep when I missed the liberty boat back to the ship has long gone. I think it was about £6 for a Murphy's. I'd booked a cabin for the night as I knew I'd be knackered but the other two decided to sleep on the deck somewhere. Apparently not very well as they were knackered in the morning. Waiting to escape at Santander. Loads of bikes on there. Then it was on the bikes heading south for Palencia. A bit further than we'd liked to have done, but it was cheap. At one point Titus veered to the left then caught it and carried on pulling over for a coffee break - he'd fallen asleep. Bloody scary. Nice enough through the mountains but not what I'd have liked to have done. Needs must I suppose. Parked up for the night. We wandered off up the road to try and find beer and food and ended up in a small tapas bar. They weren't hungry having devoured about six chickens between them that they'd got in Sainsbury's.

You're right @Marcel , it's an oversized lump dressed up to be trail bike , stick to your gay tyres ...................

Bit of attention seeking methinks ....................... what say you @Slowlycatchymonkey ?

He likes them, he rides a lot of the lanes around Devon so they must be pretty good

It's very simple , Honda and the oil barons have a shit load of 10W30 to get rid of. I'll stick to the 10w40 for now

It was in my body! When I used to join ships out in the Tropics it always used to take me about two weeks to acclimatise, and I'm older and more decrepit these days.

@Slowlycatchymonkey, have you hacked @Pedro’s account?

Fuck that, I don’t care how good the new TA is meant to be that is one boring looking bike. Honda have out-done their sensible tag.

I’ve been busy being a cockney wanker. However, you’re correct about the Tracer. Lovely bike and a blast on the roads but man-o-man do I miss the ability to head off into the great unknown. Can’t bring myself to sell the Tracer and dirt bike options are severely limited by my available budget. I’m not going down the route of buying a shit heap with the aspiration of making a silk purse out of a sow’s ear. Currently looking at a cheap-ish e-mountain bike………….who knows.

What trump quote

Today it was time to head for Portugal where Titus wanted to show us some stones. It was quite a pleasant ride through villages once we'd left the motorway. We found a campsite at Evora that was ok, it had internet, but the pitches left something to be desired. It was getting hot. Time for some laundry. Then it was time to look for stones. By the time we set off it was bloody baking. Interesting ride ending up along some dirt track. Then it was a hike down a footpath broiling in the sun, where we saw a stone. Great. After hiking up a mountain to get back to the bikes I was bushed! More water then another couple of miles to look at more stones. I thought that the mound of earth was for burying people who'd cooked for long enough. Lots of stones. I had a lie down on this one until I realised that I was cooking from it's heat. A new one for me. Bark taken for cork I assume. Then I thought it would be nice to photograph some flowers. I might have been hallucinating in the heat. It looks as if the bark has been taken off a lot of these trees. I remember this as being more colourful, man! This was the highlight of the day. Shade and beer! Unfortunately the food left something to be desired. All to be expected in the local football club bar.

Wasn't the bike a bit unstable on one leg and crutches, i thought you had a ramp LOL

I’ve serviced my bike on one leg and crutches

I didn’t even want the job and now I’m accused of knob photos

The next day I realised why I'd heard a few sirens during the night. Hotel was opposite the fire station. Then it was south again, on the motorways. We stopped for coffee and fuel, and for Titus to look for insects. Another bit of motorway to Plasencia where I had read of an aqueduct that was supposed to be worth seeing. By the time that we got there my brain was nicely cooked so after grabbing some photos and slurping water it was back onto the motorway heading for Caceres where we were to camp for the night. We arrived, with my brain cooked a bit more, at the campsite and before even going to the pitch it was beer time. Back on the bikes and up to the pitch. All a bit strange having out own toilet and shower! A guy rocked up, barney who was a few pitches down from us. He was in the queue in Millay behind us. Small world. Anyway it was time for more beer and tapas so that was it for the night. A very pleasant evening after all the motorway riding.

I thought 3000km's is when you changed bikes

He knows shit! Nothing gets thicker with heat except you and him! will type properly later when not on the phone.