Slowlycatchymonkey

The idea was to get the bikes to Spain quickly so we’d have time to get our stuff back from storage and the place set up ready before having to get back to work. Unfortunately Mr Slowlys shoulder wasn’t up to long rides so it was to be a straight down the country with 3 stop overs to minimise time on the bike. We left on Sunday morning, the weather was pretty good. Loaded up the Himalayan transfoming it into the something mess Pedro loved. Stopped at Exeter for fuel, there were bikers everywhere. Arrived at the ferry port disgruntled that in-spite of the service and MOT the clutch was very unhappy. It would not come out of 1st when stationary at all and it just didn’t feel right. Wait looking at the ferry entrance for what seems like an eternity and no Mr Slowly. Start to fear somethings happened to him and decided to use stalk my family to check his whereabouts, I see he’s not too far away and finally he arrives saying he thinks his speedos broken because he hasn’t seen me since we got on the motorway. Not the journeys start I was after. Board the ferry with so many other bikers it’s unbelievably packed, they parked us so tightly together wheels were overlapped and you had to climb over bikes to get out. No-one is impressed and I was glad it’s a couple of Enfields being clambered over and not something I’m precious about the paintwork on. The grump soon fades when we get to the cabin and see we have room to swing a cat and two nice French waiters posted outside our room. We have surprisingly powerful shower and pop down to the bar for a quick G&T then back to the room to break open the wine I’ve stowed in my voluminous cases. Goodbye grey skies. Hello bar. The next morning the skies of the northern Atlantic are improving and everything is a pleasant blue (although in this pic they look grey). Breakfast is included and although I’m not a breakfast person I’m curious to see if the kitchen produces a good breakfast. It does not. Mr Slowlys is full English is so cold it cannot be eaten and has to go back. I ask if they have a menu with gluten free marked up to be told no sorry in that way that lets you know they are very far from sorry. They can make me some gluten free toast (in the same grill they make the normal toast in) so I say no thanks. Mr Slowly intervened and says you have eggs, beans, tomatoes and bacon on here. They’re all gluten free surely. Yes they are he replies but the sausages aren’t. They then deliver my breakfast with the gluteny sausages and get the hump when I say the sausages have gluten in them. New barely warm just about passable (apart from the cold mushrooms) breakfast is delivered. I heard two other people ask if they had a gluten free menu and get the same treatment. I don’t expect to be catered for so I carry a lot of food with me but I am surprised on a boat that size with the number of people they feed to not bother. Usually this attitude comes from the chef who thinks he/she is some sort of creative genius and the public fuss making plebs who don’t understand. It’s an indication you’re in a place where it’s not safe to eat. Anyhow the ambience was then further enhanced by a lairy man and his screaming coughing snotty kids. We’d bumped into them when we were going to the lift. He eyeballed Mr Slowly like he wanted a fight. Fortunately he didn’t catch Mr Slowly’s eye as he was busy examining the ferry map. We sat far away from them. An old couple asked to be reseated to get away from the noise. The waiter wanted to know why so lairy man heard and got very pissy, old guy said no offence but your kids are coughing and spluttering, I don’t want it and I can’t hear my wife, as they wandered away he said fuck off then you stupid old cunt. Well fair play to the old man he walked back and told him no to be so rude. Which if you saw the size of the lairy one who now had violence in his eyes you would have congratulated him on his bravery. Lairy guy said he was fucking sick of people telling him about his kids and this was the eighth time on this trip at which point the guy at the next table joined in and said stop being so unpleasant and if this was the eighth time then do something about your kids. This duo somehow deflated lairy and it was all resolved before Mr Slowly retuned from the loo which I was very grateful about cos that’s just the sort of thing that would wind him up and I don’t think it would have been pretty!

I think they might be being a bit optimistic on the 1st Nov. Mahindra were not happy with the quality of some of the manufactured parts and don’t want to release shoddy bikes so it’s all delayed. Fair enough, Royal Enfield damaged their reputation by doing just that. BSA are refusing to state a date and each month say it’s sometime next month. Hope it is the 1st though!

Great pics. Loved the monochrome. Made a nice change. You’re have to do some homework on that smile though

Let’s hear your pro’s (no not the sort lorry drivers murder) for the other ones you like then. Except the GS I don’t believe that one for a second.

Trained in grumbling from birth. It’s a tough job but someone’s go to do it.

The bit about the shallow end of the gene pool doesn’t

On the way here yesterday Mr Slowly was overtaking a lorry and a white merc flew up behind him at lightning speed and sat about an inch off his rear wheel flashing his lights to get out of the way. He was mid way alongside the lorry so I don’t know where the prat thought he could go. Mr Slowly considered slowing down to annoy him but decided it would be better to stay alive and before he’d even got back across the white line the Merc pushed up the inside inches from him. I saw all of this in my mirrors, it made my blood boil so gave the appropriate hand gestures as he passed then noticed his tiny red n white almost impossible to read number plate. Apparently Diplomats are so exempt from behaving decently they have different coloured plates so no-one can stop them.

I’m hoping you do or is it a lucky dip?

Quick go buy a lottery ticket

That’s what I went for too!

I plan to!

They’re not exactly famed for speedy work I get the impression Pedro the landlord is a very competent person. Since I’ve been here he’s arranged a plumber to fix a leaky tap who turned up the next day and sorted it pronto (nice tap too ). Arranged the wifi installation on a day that suited us within just a few days and now the aircon fitters the day after we arrive who got the job done in about 2hrs. Apparently he works in television, specifically sports television and is flat out cos of some major sporting thing happening in Spain next year (maybe the World Cup?) and yet he still finds the time to write nice emails and sort everything thing out seamlessly. It makes it impossible to leave this well managed cocoon and go back to my own comparatively shambolic life in Blighty. It’s like having an unobtrusive babysitter

Blimey that was fast the aircons been fitted upstairs already. A lot of mess to clean up now though

Good luck with the house but more importantly new bike? What bike, more details needed or your just a tease.

Nothing wrong with rst’s just those ones

I’m already embarrassed on your behalf. Ride to a bike shop, buy boots, bin monstrosities

I use heated grips and thick winter gloves or mitts. The grips on the highest setting still work well. Too well on the Bandit I ended up with burns on the centre of my palms on one cold ride

What a glamorous life you’ve led. No wonder you ran away to Spain

Nice weather though so a ride out to pick up supplies will be good.

I’m hoping lazing about and sipping gin but in reality aircon guys turning up today and got to message Juan to bring our stored stuff back. Unpack n set things back up. Which all sounds easy but my Spanish is worse than when I left, I start in Spanish then somewhere along the line it turns into French and back to English

Sticky tape would be a full blown car/helicopter chase here cos obviously you’re a drug runner/vehicle theft type. Spose it’s different if you live in a place not covered with cameras.

You’d get ripped to shreds here if you obscured or obviously altered your no plate in anyway. A bit of mud is enough for a fine. An easy nick with hefty consequences. @Saul ignore the witticisms re Royal Enfield the comments are not made from any actual experience… and.. umm .. you can get a speeding ticking on a bicycle so there’s that

I have a ‘show plate’ ie not a road legal plate for skinny arsed bike of mine. It has legal size letters on a smaller yellow back plate. It looks all legal and dandy (only used on private roads and at shows not road legal obvs ). i reckon of you’re after the retro just about legal look reducing the size of the backplate (not the font size by more than 1-2mm) is worth it.