Slowlycatchymonkey

ooh classaay Frighteningly sharp haircut to go with the fake nob and sports direct outfit though

Too right, get back to whatever underground hole finds anything less than delightful acceptable.

I have a stealth mode that keeps the slider wearing plebs well away.

Indiana Jones Dial of Destiny. Another rip roaring yarn from the masters of fun. It's an eternal disappointment I didn't grow up to be Indiana Jones

You should have seen the dross on the flight this morning, it would have reinforced every prejudice you have First Saturday the schools go back is definitely a time to be avoided!

He could maybe of been good nick forty but no ginger so

I feel a lot more comfortable in Spain than I do in the UK so traitor it is

Nearly home Feels like it’s been a loonnng time.

Yerp and that makes me chuckle

Dicey today but still 7 hours of sunshine, tomoz not much cop but after that dandy.

Miss Jumentous must have been late 50’s early 60’s but and smell didn’t put off the 30ish year old man she was with.. any of your offspring in Bristol Pete?

The flights not full, I’m away from jumentous woman, RESULT!

Hmm random seating has given me a middle seat (usual if you don’t pay for allocated seating) and my relief that the woman who plonked her tiny self next to me is very short lived as the perfume is a mixture of talc and piss. Public transport

Another fine sunshiny morning in the south west

Possibly But I have a largish unsused room in my house (weird considering I always feel short on space ) that I used to feed to 20 or so guests in, but honestly I got fed up with the workload, the table is gone and a heat loving tree would thrive, just a case of finding a thriving tree a good spot later. We can now quite suddenly successfully grow grapes (yer thats right global warming is a con ) so I reckon its a go.

I don’t know you feckin had it last when you pinned your last speeding points on me. ps don’ think I haven’t forgotten the promise of a cheap Corsa in return

FFS boy arrived home angry as hell cos the Thai green curry I made at the flat yesterday has spilt all over the floor of his car. Apparently this is my fault because HE didn’t pay attention to the bit where I said - ok yes you can bring it home, tape the lid down and tie it in a carrier bag in case a dickhead does something mad in front of you!! Anyhoo give me 5.. 10.. 20.. mins.. kids

Will look for a protected sunny spot

Still can’t find my driving licence. Getting serious now cos the car hire people are touchy about people actually having a bastard licence!

When my mother in law was contemplating her future legacy I suggested giving a bit of the land back to nature and planting some trees. Like a bit of an arboretum area for the folk who work so feckin hard all the time in the yard. Much to my surprise she went for it and now theres a bit of green with a large pond and a load of developing trees. The folding chairs and picnic blankets appear in the summer. I’m very happy with that. I wouldn’t have minded my other suggestion taking off which was planting a field of fruit trees that people can come and help themselves to the fruits of. Unfortunately it involves members of the public having access and that involves liability insurance etc etc but I think perhaps I can make it happen later on ps @Pedro thanks for the update. So nice to see them doing well. Perhaps on your next jaunt to Morocco you could post us a couple of seeds for the farm and a tiny bit of Maria’s legacy can live on in the fields here too?!

Whats a ‘blue light card holder’?

As an educated man you might enjoy this- From hob and nob, hob or nob (“a phrase spoken when making a toast, possibly meaning ‘give and take’; to take turns toasting or buying rounds of drinks”) (archaic), from dialectal hab nab (“to have or have not, in the sense of an invitation to have a drink”),[1][2] from Old English habban (“to have, possess”) (ultimately from Proto-Indo-European *keh₂p- (“to grab, seize”)) + nabban (“to not have”) (from ne (ultimately from Proto-Indo-European *ne (“not”)) + habban).

Aah thanks for putting me out of my misery. That was doing my head in Its.. its.. oh its that guy.. you know the one who.. urr umm.. shit.. the rapper.. goddam I got old