Slowlycatchymonkey

Thanks I was breaking hard before impact and felt like I almost had back control (but I didn’t) so apart from a smashed wing mirror, some scuffing on the engine bars the bike looks remarkably good. Getting the bars out of the barriers was the hardest part! Mind you I’ve not looked at it closely.

Pissed up and drowning unable to swim is pretty impressive. I’d give that 6 out of 10 because it wasn’t you who caused the boat to sink, he gets a solid 7!

Yep it really could have been. Lucky and unlucky at the same time. I realised later I could well of not just killed myself prancing around the motorway like a prize prat on supermarket sweep, I probably would have taken other people out with me by causing a pile up.. guilt galore!

A car. Small car, red, thats about all I caught cos I was otherwise engaged

Can’t get into the wire. Probably too much hype but the bits I saw left me cold.

Film Nobody with Bob Odenkirk on Netflix. Absolute tosh, but somehow entertaining. They took a load of cliche’s and pasted them together (which I found humorous) and chucked in a lot of extreme violence, it flew by.

Last week- Riding on the autovia about 70mph, it was really busy which is unusual. Bump Hit from behind, a tap but enough to send things totally out of control. Careered towards the hard shoulder before coming off. Bike handle bar wedged inbetween barrier but somehow I’ve fallen into the gap the my jumbo panniers created and apart from a shot of adrenaline of epic proportions I am somehow ok. I look down the motorway and see some distance back my tank bag in the middle lane and the contents strewn at large distances across all three lanes. I briefly consider if theres anything that would identify this as mine, there isn’t, then I remember my house keys are in there, meh, so is my pannier key - oh my passport is in my pannier, oh well still not worth risking it - my hearing aids are also in there fuck fuck FUCK NOOOOO. You know vids on youtube of people doing things so incredibly stupid you watch in utter disbelief and think well they don’t exactly deserve to die but perhaps it’s just natural selection doing it’s thing? Yep I ran all over the carriageway of a busy motorway trying to retrieve my hearing aids. Which were in a paper bag cos papers breathable but also very easily blown about by traffic. I haven’t processed the next bit but the flashbacks aren’t fun so moving on. I get back to the bike fully expecting the popo to turn up any second because there’s no way someone’s not going to report a stupid person dancing in motorway traffic and a bike over in the barriers. Ok thats all I can manage now, typing this is making me sweat. Last instalment tomoz, or the next day or whenever I can type without my heart pounding nineteen to the dozen Pretty dumb though ay, beat that!

Have you ever done anything so stupid that it nearly led you to an early grave? Something unthinking you were surprised you survived and look back on wondering how you could have been so dumb? If you haven’t either A) I don’t believe you or B) You lack the reckless gene and we’re probably not friends or C) it’s true you’re not stupid enough to stick a fork in a toaster

Little bugger wasn’t going to play ball today ay!

It’s just utterly gobsmacking isn’t it.

Lovely. I was wondering if it had gone down well but I can see it’s written all over the pic! Did you get to do the other things you weren’t sure you would like visit galleries?

One day when I’ve stopped shaking

I also have an audiology appointment Friday. My beloved new hearing aid came a cropper last week in a way I’m currently too traumatised to discuss. Let’s just say one survived being run over multiple times, the other one didn’t. And it’s the dominant hearing aid that controls the Bluetooth connection, the roger pen, little mic and just about everything that made these aids great. Rather distressing as I know this is going to take forever to get sorted because it looks in perfect nick and I leave on a group trip in about a weeks time which is going to be a whole nother experience now. Heyho at least it was only the hearing aid that didn’t make it!

Not another illness, that really does suck. Hope you’re feeling better soon.

Lots to do over the coming week, so I’ll probably be on here avoiding it all for as long as possible. Still got some cake left over from yesterday, I think this is a sign I’m supposed to continue with the tea drinking and time wasting until it’s all gone How did the work on your house turn out @Clive?

I originally typed Are all your extremities intact but didn’t want to leave you open to insults, should have known better

Congrats. Sounds good, if freezing, still got all your fingers n toes?!

Now I like that.

Bloody hell Pete, not again already?! And yet somehow you don’t get multiple bike ownership Suppose you don’t need to when you change your bike more often than Yen changes his undercackers.

Bit of an assumption there. I have no intention of trying to justify it to any great degree. I like bikes and I’ve got the money so why not, life’s short.

Not sure, he certainly looks short in pics.

You find multiple bike ownership confusing?

You could do some jobs around the house but who will drink the coffee and pay attention to the radio?