yen_powell

Which is fine if unlike my mate, you haven't bought a new CCM only to find the company folds, your warranty goes up the pictures and the reformed company say, 'nothing to do with us matey, keep that muddy thing away from us, would you like a trendy cafe racer with free lumberjack shirt?'.

Don't CCM get sold and go bust every 10 years and then get bought back by the original owners and the process repeats itself?

I thought you did damp motorcycling, or is that just inside the trackies? By the way, is that a mirror in the middle of the shelves or a doorway?

No, they look like they have been put together with proper tools. My ex Father in Law is a Brummie and I once watched him use a hammer to put a screw into a piece of wood. "Aha", says I, "The famous Birmingham Screwdriver I have heard about. What do you use screwdrivers for then?" His answer was, "Them's fer opening tins of paint obviously, is yow stupid??.."

Aha, they were built in Blighty.

Grassy Arse my old gringo, bloody boneos idlios, that's your trouble. I googled the name of the company mentioned and it said that it was built using British money. I suspect the hand of either a Brit engine designer or something built under licence based on UK designs. "The GSSR was a British undertaking, built in southeast Spain at the end of the 19th century. Its original purpose was to link Murcia in the province of the same name with Granada, also in the province of the same name. A lack of money and an underestimation of the terrain to be crossed meant that the final project only linked the three towns of Lorca, Águilas (Murcia) and Baza (Granada). The remaining sections of the line were eventually constructed by other companies. Although the termini were in other provinces the major part of the line went through the scenic Almanzora Valley in Almería."

That is a very British looking engine, can someone translate the text?

That really looks like one of those roofless Quasars from the 70s.

He's the Douglas Bader of trail riding! Hopefully he's friendlier to Germans though.

It's his knob, it is just out of sight up his shorts and wedges into the sleeve of the artificial limb so it holds on tight. That's why he is doing a few little stamps after refitting it, to make sure his balls aren't trapped in it as well.

Not a chance, these things will be on the internet forever!

So this is you getting on and off a bike when old and fucked. I can see what you mean, very careful movements, the slight breathlessness. What I really want to know, is how long ago were you fucked before making the video and what was his name?

I watched that On Any Sunday. It was good, don't get me wrong, especially the stuff about Steve Mcwossitsname, but I swear the film lasted about a week. My fave bike film was Stone, the Australian film with lots of big Kawasakis and the beheading in the opening titles.

That collapsing wall may have been lacking in drain holes at the bottom. I went to Seville once, waited most of the day for tyre shop staff to come back from their lunch time snoozette so my mate Charlie could get a new rear tyre. Charlie's knobs had detached on the motorway not long before you see. This is because he was too tight to put a new tyre on before we set off, just used an old one with what he thought was a decent amount of tread on it. I have vague memories of riding around a large bull ring hoping I was using the right bit of a one way road and wondering where the marmalade factory was.

Here he is when it got sehr nippy.

Oh if only there was a Distinguished Scruffs' Ride...Sigh.

It's just brown love boys, just brown love......

You've got a Harley though haven't you, I think Pete meant from a girl.?

We used to have a bloke come out with us green laning, he was known as Witham Porno Man, because of where he lived and what he did for a living. He could turn his bike by doing a rear wheel burn out and turning on the spot. We used to moan at him about making us look like hooligans in front of the public and then all try it secretly when he wasn't there. All we ever managed was to fall over side ways as one foot would get more and more twisted until we lost our balance. The swine could do it on a road bike as well.

I have to admit, he is pretty good, I never considered him to be a good singer when I was a kid and it was on telly every week. Shame he passed away, did you see him in The League of Gentlemen, i think he was running a zoo on a roundabout or something.

Go on Pete, give 'em a blast of Whispering Grass.

I like this cos it's got Xtreme playing the Sergeant major.

If you're not in the picture then you took it..

Morocco was once and many years ago, before two men on BMWs ruined it for everyone. Abroad now is a normal holiday and hire bikes if you can get them. Last year was Rhodes and a Pegaso single cylinder bike. Just used it to explore and nip into the capital, I used to park it behind a lace stall run by a very old lady on the city walls, she was lovely, she would guide me into the space after the first day. I was in Corfu again 2 years ago, hired the same bike you have Pete, one of those Suzuki 650 v-twin things. Hated it, I took it back because it was hard to ride on a steady throttle, very jerky, told the owner it needed the injectors balancing. He polished it and sprayed lube on the chain and gave it back with exactly the same problem. I just had to ensure I was always speeding up or slowing down. I stopped for a red light on one of their main roads which caught the truck behind out (they usually go through for a few seconds after). I heard a lot of tyre squealing as he slid sideways behind me. He did wave an apology and as I pulled away he was using forward and reverse to get himself pointing the right way again. Before that it was Cyprus, the Tenere seen in the other picture on here somewhere. Also tried a quad. Did take both on unsurfaced roads, the Tenere was way safer. Malta, no bike hired, it was very cold and wet, also hard to even park a bike there, lovely place, very crowded. I believe even the countryside is classed as a conurbation by population density. Cyprus and the same Tenere before that, it was still new then. Portugal, scooter only available, 125 I think. Under seat storage was useful for shopping, not a lot of go though. Parked it in the 'Rua Sir Cliff Richard' one day, which is, I kid you not, the street with the cemetery in it. Lanzarote, BMW single. The only off road there is full of rocks spat out by a volcano, beautiful and moon like scenery. Can't go back as I had a parking ticket and left without paying it. If I go back they might hunt me down and do terrible spanish things to me. Pics below are varied and of all dates, Essex green lanes on my DR (currently being put back together) and my Africa Twin, Isle of Wight, Peterborough speedway track, moped race (I'm in the red shirt white crash hat), Wiltshire, Lanzarote, Morocco, my contractors yard, Billingsgate Fish market (traffic light tree I put up). Also Cambrian rally on a CRM250 lent to me a few minutes before by a dealer, what a guy. My bike had just failed scrutineering, wheel bearings had gone trail riding day before. I went to a bloke displaying bikes to try and get a bearing, he offered me a choice of bikes to borrow instead. Also Salisbury Plain, one picture looks like Little House on the Prairie to me, on my first DR kickstart....or rather didn't. Finally there is one on the Ridgeway on my Varadero on my way to a bike rally, the day before it closes for the winter. I believe that is supposed to be the oldest known road in Britain.