Pedro

So, @Clive, this guys goes out drinking with his friends and decided to end the night with a visit to his local "gentleman's club", however he is running very low on funds for such activities. We walks in, and sheepishly asks for a girl. Once talking to the madam, he confesses he only has 15 quid to spare, but still would like to end the night in style. She tells him that for such a small amount all he could get is a "penguin blowjob". He isn't too thrilled by the sound of it, but she tells him he'll enjoy it so in he goes. A moment goes by, and an older lady joins him, not the kind of young beauty he was hoping for but beggars can't be choosers. She leans him against the wall, tells him to relax, drops his pants and gets going. She had experience, and he's really starting to enjoy himself, he starts getting REALLY into it and just as he feels like he's about to reach his climax, the "penguin blowjob" creeps back up on his mind, he has no idea why would such a masterful blowjob be called such an unappealing name. He says: "This is just lovely, you're so great at this, I'm about to cum!!!" Having been warned of his pending explosion, the lady stops and walks away. Still leaning against the wall, with his ankles bound by his pants, he tries to follow her in desperation:

There a funny joke about blowjobs and walking like a penguin!

POS

It was Pete's job to post this stuff, I'll do it: https://www.majorcadailybulletin.com/news/local/2024/05/25/124203/mallorca-tourism-britons-arrested-palma-airport-for-not-paying-hotel-bill.html The old "I'll just go to the ATM" runner

Agreed. It's never worse it until something bad and unplanned happens. As another note, Europe sees unmarried couples as having legitimacy and rights and we get used to that. But if something bad happens in some other parts of the world, suddenly that is not the case and suddenly you're both two people with no connection to each other.

That's very considerate, you were worried we'd all start sending gifts?

Considering the others, I'm quite happy to be considered in my own category I think we're a step away from being able to have a deputy in the EU.

That's a contradiction, but ok. Maybe he just left for a wee behind the dumpster instead of properly flouncing. Or he's just looking to power up his computer.

Proper flounce with asking to delete his content and everything?

That happened the first year the Portuguese got given free insurance recovery with most car insurances, and it coincided with a high rise in fuel prices. Suddenly a lot of cars used to go on holiday to the Algarve broke down and required a tow truck and a taxi service to come back home at the end of holidays

55mph top, 45mph cruising on country roads isn't so bad.

You should ride it to Italy.

FCPorto. I'm not a football guy but I'm local to Porto, and on a match against a team from Lisbon I am for us northerners. To see Pinto da Costa weeping as he's just left the position of president after 42 years in it, and the coach Sérgio Conceição also with tears in his eyes, being an ex player and hardcore "Porto", probably also coaching his last match in the club, I have to admit it was moving.

It doesn't need to move! Don't try and kill Bob off with a mad engine in a 10 inch wheel scooter. I hope it shall be used to fetch pizzas to the household and take Ersilia out for dinner on summer evenings.

You just squeeze that in on this thread like you've having cheese toasts and mimosas for brunch? Congratulations!

Why did you buy, @boboneleg?

That’s completely nuts!

85% sure? 90%?

I bet there's a MX engine in there, 80cc or 125cc.

I've finished my wine over dinner, like the church says. I'm on tea now, you alcoholics!

This is what you want for a scooter, proper basket.

You’ve managed to fill half a glass without losing any from the bottle. That’s drinking skills!