Renegade Posted Monday at 20:50 Share Posted Monday at 20:50 A man is doing yard work and his wife is about to take a shower. The man realizes that he can't find the rake. He yells up to his wife, "Where is the rake?" She can't hear him and shouts back, "What?" The man first points to his eye, then points to his knee and finally makes a raking motion. The wife is not sure and again says, "What?" The man repeats his gestures. The wife replies that she understands and decides to signal back. She first points to her eye, next she points to her left breast, then she points to her butt, and finally to her crotch. Well, there is no way in hell the man can even come close on that one. Exasperated, he goes upstairs and asks her, "What in the hell was that?" She replies... EYE - LEFT TIT - BEHIND - THE BUSH!" 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted Monday at 23:29 Share Posted Monday at 23:29 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted Monday at 23:29 Share Posted Monday at 23:29 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted Monday at 23:30 Share Posted Monday at 23:30 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renegade Posted Tuesday at 16:14 Share Posted Tuesday at 16:14 Two guys grow-up together, but after college one moves to Georgia and the other to Texas. They agree to meet every ten years in Florida to play golf. At age 32 they meet, finish their round of golf, and head for lunch. "Where you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why Hooters?" "They have those servers with big boobs, tight shorts, and gorgeous legs." "You're on." At age 42, they meet and play golf again. "Where you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters." “Again? Why?" "They have a cold beer, big screen TVs, and side action on the games." "OK." At age 52 they meet and play again. "So where you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters.” "Why?” "The food is pretty good and there's plenty of parking." "OK." At age 62 they meet again. After a round of golf, one says, "Where you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Wings are half price and the food isn't too spicy." "Good choice" At age 72 they meet again. Once again, after a round of golf, one says, "Where shall we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" “They have six handicapped parking spaces right by the door and they have senior discounts." "Great choice." At age 82 they meet and play again. "Where should we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Because we've never been there before." "Okay, let’s give it a try." 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sir Fallsalot Posted Tuesday at 18:32 Share Posted Tuesday at 18:32 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catteeclan Posted Tuesday at 18:37 Share Posted Tuesday at 18:37 2 hours ago, Renegade said: Two guys grow-up together, but after college one moves to Georgia and the other to Texas. They agree to meet every ten years in Florida to play golf. At age 32 they meet, finish their round of golf, and head for lunch. "Where you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why Hooters?" "They have those servers with big boobs, tight shorts, and gorgeous legs." "You're on." At age 42, they meet and play golf again. "Where you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters." “Again? Why?" "They have a cold beer, big screen TVs, and side action on the games." "OK." At age 52 they meet and play again. "So where you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters.” "Why?” "The food is pretty good and there's plenty of parking." "OK." At age 62 they meet again. After a round of golf, one says, "Where you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Wings are half price and the food isn't too spicy." "Good choice" At age 72 they meet again. Once again, after a round of golf, one says, "Where shall we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" “They have six handicapped parking spaces right by the door and they have senior discounts." "Great choice." At age 82 they meet and play again. "Where should we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Because we've never been there before." "Okay, let’s give it a try." I can't imagine a time I get bored of boobs 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted Tuesday at 21:50 Share Posted Tuesday at 21:50 3 hours ago, Catteeclan said: I can't imagine a time I get bored of boobs Well this place is full of tits. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boboneleg Posted Wednesday at 20:29 Share Posted Wednesday at 20:29 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted 23 hours ago Share Posted 23 hours ago Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted 23 hours ago Share Posted 23 hours ago 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renegade Posted 20 hours ago Share Posted 20 hours ago I went shopping today in Asda and i was behind a grandfather and his badly-behaved grandson. He has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets, biscuits, all sorts of things. The granddad is saying in a controlled voice: “Easy, William, we won’t be long . . . easy boy.” Another outburst and I heard the granddad calmly say : “It’s okay William. Just a couple more minutes and we’ll be out of here. Hang in there, boy.” At the checkout the little horror is throwing items out of the trolley. Granddad says again in a controlled voice : “William, William, relax buddy, don’t get upset. We’ll be home in five minutes, stay cool William.” Well, i was really impressed, so i went outside to where the grandfather is loading his groceries and the boy into the car. I said to the Grandad “It’s none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don’t know how you did it. That whole time you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying things would be okay. William is very lucky to have you as his granddad.” “Thanks,” said the Granddad. “But I am William. The little bastard’s name is Kevin.” 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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