Renegade Posted March 24 Share Posted March 24 A man is doing yard work and his wife is about to take a shower. The man realizes that he can't find the rake. He yells up to his wife, "Where is the rake?" She can't hear him and shouts back, "What?" The man first points to his eye, then points to his knee and finally makes a raking motion. The wife is not sure and again says, "What?" The man repeats his gestures. The wife replies that she understands and decides to signal back. She first points to her eye, next she points to her left breast, then she points to her butt, and finally to her crotch. Well, there is no way in hell the man can even come close on that one. Exasperated, he goes upstairs and asks her, "What in the hell was that?" She replies... EYE - LEFT TIT - BEHIND - THE BUSH!" 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted March 24 Share Posted March 24 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted March 24 Share Posted March 24 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted March 24 Share Posted March 24 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renegade Posted March 25 Share Posted March 25 Two guys grow-up together, but after college one moves to Georgia and the other to Texas. They agree to meet every ten years in Florida to play golf. At age 32 they meet, finish their round of golf, and head for lunch. "Where you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why Hooters?" "They have those servers with big boobs, tight shorts, and gorgeous legs." "You're on." At age 42, they meet and play golf again. "Where you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters." “Again? Why?" "They have a cold beer, big screen TVs, and side action on the games." "OK." At age 52 they meet and play again. "So where you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters.” "Why?” "The food is pretty good and there's plenty of parking." "OK." At age 62 they meet again. After a round of golf, one says, "Where you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Wings are half price and the food isn't too spicy." "Good choice" At age 72 they meet again. Once again, after a round of golf, one says, "Where shall we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" “They have six handicapped parking spaces right by the door and they have senior discounts." "Great choice." At age 82 they meet and play again. "Where should we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Because we've never been there before." "Okay, let’s give it a try." 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sir Fallsalot Posted March 25 Share Posted March 25 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catteeclan Posted March 25 Share Posted March 25 2 hours ago, Renegade said: Two guys grow-up together, but after college one moves to Georgia and the other to Texas. They agree to meet every ten years in Florida to play golf. At age 32 they meet, finish their round of golf, and head for lunch. "Where you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why Hooters?" "They have those servers with big boobs, tight shorts, and gorgeous legs." "You're on." At age 42, they meet and play golf again. "Where you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters." “Again? Why?" "They have a cold beer, big screen TVs, and side action on the games." "OK." At age 52 they meet and play again. "So where you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters.” "Why?” "The food is pretty good and there's plenty of parking." "OK." At age 62 they meet again. After a round of golf, one says, "Where you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Wings are half price and the food isn't too spicy." "Good choice" At age 72 they meet again. Once again, after a round of golf, one says, "Where shall we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" “They have six handicapped parking spaces right by the door and they have senior discounts." "Great choice." At age 82 they meet and play again. "Where should we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Because we've never been there before." "Okay, let’s give it a try." I can't imagine a time I get bored of boobs 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted Tuesday at 21:50 Share Posted Tuesday at 21:50 3 hours ago, Catteeclan said: I can't imagine a time I get bored of boobs Well this place is full of tits. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boboneleg Posted Wednesday at 20:29 Share Posted Wednesday at 20:29 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted Thursday at 06:50 Share Posted Thursday at 06:50 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted Thursday at 06:50 Share Posted Thursday at 06:50 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renegade Posted Thursday at 10:37 Share Posted Thursday at 10:37 I went shopping today in Asda and i was behind a grandfather and his badly-behaved grandson. He has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets, biscuits, all sorts of things. The granddad is saying in a controlled voice: “Easy, William, we won’t be long . . . easy boy.” Another outburst and I heard the granddad calmly say : “It’s okay William. Just a couple more minutes and we’ll be out of here. Hang in there, boy.” At the checkout the little horror is throwing items out of the trolley. Granddad says again in a controlled voice : “William, William, relax buddy, don’t get upset. We’ll be home in five minutes, stay cool William.” Well, i was really impressed, so i went outside to where the grandfather is loading his groceries and the boy into the car. I said to the Grandad “It’s none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don’t know how you did it. That whole time you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying things would be okay. William is very lucky to have you as his granddad.” “Thanks,” said the Granddad. “But I am William. The little bastard’s name is Kevin.” 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renegade Posted Friday at 11:27 Share Posted Friday at 11:27 I was having sex with my friend's wife, the phone rang. I heard it was her husband and I quickly started to get dressed. She told me not to worry. He was out drinking with me! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Six30 Posted Friday at 18:24 Share Posted Friday at 18:24 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saul Posted Saturday at 09:05 Share Posted Saturday at 09:05 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Six30 Posted Saturday at 09:38 Share Posted Saturday at 09:38 32 minutes ago, Saul said: 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saul Posted Saturday at 15:50 Share Posted Saturday at 15:50 6 hours ago, Six30 said: You already have, nosterol fucker 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Six30 Posted Saturday at 16:49 Share Posted Saturday at 16:49 58 minutes ago, Saul said: You already have, nosterol fucker Twat 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted Saturday at 17:31 Share Posted Saturday at 17:31 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catteeclan Posted yesterday at 17:09 Share Posted yesterday at 17:09 Earache has just reminded me of this I got sent Saturday morning, been giggling about it since. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted 14 hours ago Share Posted 14 hours ago 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckster Posted 14 hours ago Share Posted 14 hours ago 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sir Fallsalot Posted 3 hours ago Share Posted 3 hours ago Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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